第七章（第11/13页）

泰德·博尔顿因矿井爆炸殒命时，年仅28岁。走在前面的工头高喊快点卧倒，当时他们一行四人。大家都及时趴在地上，只有泰德除外，他就这样丢了性命。调查事故起因时，矿主们声称泰德因为惊慌失措，试图逃跑，而且违背命令，所以过失主要在他。因此，赔偿金只有可怜的300镑，而且矿方还认为这是法外施恩，因为过失全在个人。而且，他们还不肯一次把钱付清，她起初想用这笔钱开个小店。可矿主们说若一次付清，她准会将其挥霍干净，天天买醉也说不定。所以她只好每周去领30先令。没错，每周一早晨她都得去趟办公室，站在那儿等上一两个钟头；是的，整整四年时间，她几乎风雨不误。可有两个孩子嗷嗷待哺，她又能怎么做呢？幸而泰德的母亲对她很好。从伊迪斯蹒跚开始学步，她就接过白天照看姐妹俩的责任，而她，艾薇·博尔顿，则去谢菲尔德参加了战地医院培训班，学到第四年，她甚至修习了护理课程，并顺利拿到文凭。她决定自食其力，把两个孩子拉扯成人。于是，她便在乌斯维特医院谋得助理的职位，在那个小地方工作了一段时间。后来公司，特弗沙尔煤矿公司，说白了就是老板杰弗里爵士，看到她如此自强自立，为照顾孤儿寡母，给了她担任教区护士的机会，还处处关照她，博尔顿太太将过往种种原原本本地告诉康妮姐俩。从那时起，她就一直在教区工作，直到感觉有些力不从心，她打算做点稍微轻松的差事，担当教区护士需要四处奔波、忙个不停。

"Yes, the Company's been very good to me, I always say it. But I should never forget what they said about Ted, for he was as steady and fearless a chap as ever set foot on the cage, and it was as good as branding him a coward. But there, he was dead, and could say nothing to none of "em." It was a queer mixture of feelings the woman showed as she talked. She liked the colliers, whom she had nursed for so long; but she felt very superior to them. She felt almost upper class; and at the same time a resentment against the ruling class smouldered in her. The masters! In a dispute between masters and men, she was always for the men. But when there was no question of contest, she was pining to be superior, to be one of the upper class. The upper classes fascinated her, appealing to her peculiar English passion for superiority. She was thrilled to come to Wragby; thrilled to talk to Lady Chatterley, my word, different from the common colliers' wives! She said so in so many words. Yet one could see a grudge against the Chatterleys peep out in her; the grudge against the masters.

“没错，公司待我不薄，我总是把这挂在嘴边。但我无法忘记他们对泰德的评价，因为他是个勇敢坚定的好矿工，但却无端地被打上胆小鬼的烙印。可现在，他已身故多年，再也没有申辩的机会。”这女人的言谈话语中，有多种情感奇异地交错着。对自己多年来护理过的矿工，她饱含深情，但又自觉比他们优越许多。她几乎认为自己是个上等人，同时在心底又涌动着对统治阶级的切齿仇恨。作威作福的家伙们！当矿主与工人发生冲突，她总是向工友们伸出援手。但当两方相安无事，她又羡慕那高高在上的优越感，渴望成为上层阶级的一份子。上层阶级的身份让她日思夜想，激起了她对优越感的极度渴望，那是英国人特有的性格特征。来到拉格比，让她兴奋不已，能和查泰莱夫人交谈，更使她激动万分，哎呀，普通矿工家的婆娘哪能跟她相提并论！她滔滔不绝地表达着自己的仰慕之情。但她的言行举止，还是透露出对查泰莱家族的忌恨，对上层阶级的仇视。

"Why, yes, of course, it would wear Lady Chatterley out! It's a mercy she had a sister to come and help her. Men don't think, high and low-alike, they take what a woman does for them for granted. Oh, I've told the colliers off about it many a time. But it's very hard for Sir Clifford, you know, crippled like that. They were always a haughty family, standoffish in a way, as they've a right to be. But then to be brought down like that! And it's very hard on Lady Chatterley, perhaps harder on her. What she misses! I only had Ted three years, but my word, while I had him I had a husband I could never forget. He was one in a thousand, and jolly as the day. Who'd ever have thought he'd get killed? I don't believe it to this day somehow, I've never believed it, though I washed him with my own hands. But he was never dead for me, he never was. I never took it in.” This was a new voice in Wragby, very new for Connie to hear; it roused a new ear in her.

“哎，没错，这样肯定会把查泰莱夫人累垮的！幸好她有姐姐过来帮忙。男人们从不会考虑这些，无论身份高低，他们将女人所做的一切都当作天经地义。噢，这些话我不知道跟矿工们说过多少回。但克利福德爵士也确实够难的，他毕竟身有残疾。查泰莱家族历来趾高气昂，对人爱搭不理，因为人家确实有资格这么做。但不想后来遭此重创！查泰莱夫人也真不容易，或许肩头的压力更重。她失去的太多了！我和泰德只做了三年夫妻，可说实话，拥有他，我便拥有一个永生难忘的伴侣。他是千里挑一的好丈夫，总是那样乐观快活。谁能想到他突然就命丧黄泉？直到今天，我依然无法相信这是真的，我无法接受这一事实，虽然入殓前是我亲手帮他擦洗。但在我心里，他未曾死去，他还活得好好的。我难以接受这一噩耗。”拉格比终于迎来新声音，康妮倍感新鲜，也饶有兴趣地听她倾诉衷肠。